Rating: T (Teen—Language, adult situations)

Notes: House belongs to Universal and its copyright holders. Please send comments to dante0220@yahoo.com.

Pairings: House/Wilson; House/Cuddy


Chapter 1

House sat in his office, thumping his cane against the floor.

Ka thunk! Ka thunk! Ka thunk!

For the past two days, he had been acting completely out of character…desperate really. This cosmic-level anomaly manifested itself in attended clinic hours, concern about Foreman and neglect of his game boy and soaps.

He frowned, thinking how much of his inner self he had allowed to surface. While he did care, he kept people away with the gruff exterior. How would he keep doing that if he let the goodie moments sweeten the well too overly much? If he let people think that he cared about them, would they leave him alone? “Now you’re going soft,” he chided himself.

“Or maybe you’ve always cared?” Wilson proposed from the doorway.

House shot him a furious look. “Been dabbling in the pop shrinkage, have we? Dazzle me with your knowledge!”

The oncologist shook his head, remembering that the other clearly sat on the defensive. “Heaven knows why I’d care about you. I mean you are usually a crass, mean bastard. But you care.”

“Buttering me up isn’t going to win you points,” the diagnostician retorted tersely.

Wilson rolled his eyes. “You do fool everyone else, House. I know differently.”

House did one of his blank sarcastic stares. “Ooooh! Dr. Freud’s doing focus groups! Tell me, Doc, why do you think I’m human?”

Wilson scratched his head, trying to put an answer together that wouldn’t get him caned out of the room.

“Well? I’m on a tight schedule. And here Cuddy thinks you’re such a model citizen….”

Wilson chuckled. “Cuddy knows better than that, House. All right, I’ve seen you vulnerable. Despite your attitude, you do care about those people…or animals in Steve’s case….that you let into your inner circle.”

This discussion was definitely starting to get under House’s skin. “And you really think you’re part of that circle?” He snorted. “If I go all nicie-nice, I won’t scare the kiddies anymore!”

Let it go, James. He shrugged, knowing his friend too well. “And where would you be then?” He put his hands up defensively to stop the verbal assault he knew would be forthcoming. “I know it was an extraordinary circumstance. Now that everything’s back to normal, you’ll be too, I expect.” He started to leave and then stopped, lingering in place for a minute.

House rolled his eyes, knowing his friend had a point to make with this pregnant pause. “Yes?”

Wilson smiled. “It’s been nice to see this side of you, House. Wish we could see it more often.” With that, he left.

House went back to thumping his cane. Something was bugging him. For several minutes, he couldn’t figure out what it was. Then he remembered. The scene in Cuddy’s office with Foreman’s father…not to mention Cameron chewing her out later. He made a mental note to talk with Cameron about her theatrics again. Still he knew what he had to do…as much as it galled him to do it.

“Damn it. I’ll never live this one down,” he groused, heading for the elevator.


Chapter 2
[An hour later—Cuddy’s Office]

While she was relieved that Foreman was okay, Cuddy second-guessed herself rather than focus on paperwork. On the one hand, as Dean of Medicine, she had to keep House from violating protocol. Yet weren’t those protocols meant to be bent occasionally? Or even broken if need be? Couldn’t somebody care about those around him or her?

I let myself go in trying to help Manny. How ironic. The same type of case stares us in the face with similar symptoms, attachments and radical theories and we can’t even see it! At least Foreman’s okay. Manny lost his hand. She bit her lip; the guilt lingering on her soul. How many times do House and I have to do this dance? At least he was there for me. I had to be there for him. He chewed me out when I stepped over the line. He might be pissed but it was the right thing to do. She stopped and glanced out the window. Then why do I feel like crap for doing it?  “Sometimes, I hate this job.”

“Good. That makes two of us,” House retorted while limping into the suite unannounced as always. “Glad you’re here. We need to talk.”

Whenever she heard those words from or about him, she winced. Visions of lawsuits danced through her head. She arched her eyebrow anxiously. “What did you do now, House?”

“Other than check on Foreman, nothing. I mean, you kicked me out of the clinic. What do I do for fun now?” he retorted.

She shook her head. “That was only while Foreman needed that brilliant yet twisted mind of yours. I expect you back there.”

He smirked. “Oh no, Cuddy. You told me I could play with my ball, write on the whiteboard, etc.”

“Fine!” she conceded. “No clinic hours today. Tomorrow, you’re back on duty. Got it?”

He grimaced. “Great. Sniffles and amateur diagnoses galore. And here I was trying to be considerate.”

That got a smirk. “You actually know how to be considerate? Maybe I should call a press conference.” Seeing his face darken, she put up her hands. “Sorry. That was uncalled for, House. I needed to jab someone and figured you could take it.” She walked across the room and shut the door. “Actually I’m glad you’re here.”

He eyed her cautiously for a minute, trying to figure out exactly what that meant. “Saying that and shutting the door? What will the kids think, Cuddy? Cameron might start pouting again.”

She glared at him. “Cameron can dream up whatever she wants. As for the kids, I’m sure you have something to do with that! Administrator needs her image, you know.”

He took a deep breath. While he did enjoy teasing her, he did respect her as a person. “All right, sorry. I was going off of base instinct. That’s actually why I’m here.” He averted his eyes, not wanting to look at her as he admitted, “Sorry about giving you such a bad time before with Foreman’s Dad. We all had it rough. I shouldn’t have tried to guilt you out.”

For the second time in five minutes, she stared at him incredulously. “You’re apologizing for being sneaky and manipulative? Who are you and what have you done with Greg House?”

He sighed and then chuckled. “Actually, I’m his goodie two shoes clone. The real House is back in his diabolical lair trying to figure out how to clone you without the attitude.”

“And compensating with other things, I imagine?” she supposed.

“Can’t live without the cleavage,” he quipped.

She had to smile…despite how degrading that answer was to her. Still, it was his way of flirting with her and she had to admit (albeit to herself and nobody else) that she loved the attention. At least, he’s getting back to normal. She sat back down behind the desk and considered him for a minute before replying, “Be that as it may, House, I guess it’s my turn to apologize.”

“The boss admits she’s wrong to the minion? This oughtta be good.”

She shut him up with the Glare again. “Enjoy the moment. Anyhow, I’m sorry that I had to be so hard on you too over these past few days. You probably think I love every part of being the boss. Well I don’t. I hate it when regulations make you choose between protocols and friends. I didn’t enjoy risking Foreman’s life. Nor did I relish kicking you when you were most vulnerable.” She took a deep breath. “You want to know something else?”

“I’m afraid to ask but you’re on a roll, Cuddy.”

She simply smiled and squeezed his left hand with hers, looking into his eyes as she did so. “I liked what I’ve seen in you, Greg. I know you don’t like people to see that side of you. But some of us know it’s there. Thanks for reminding us.” Her eyes watered.

“Yeah whatever.” He waved the last part off. “As I told Wilson earlier, don’t let it out. I do have a rep to protect.” He considered her words and nodded. “We do have to help each other, right? Granted, you lack my style but it got the job done.”

“Thank Heavens for that. Lord knows, I’ve had more than enough time to watch you at work, House,” she countered, rolling her eyes.

“That’s me. The one and only. Well until the clones are ready. The prototype’s being sent to Vogler’s jail cell for testing,” he cracked, letting a smirk spread across his face as he said it.

Imagining several Houses limping around the hospital…and torturing Vogler too…made her palms sweat…and gave her a weird thrill. “You are hopeless.”

“Takes one to know one,” he retorted.

She shrugged. “Fine. Well being the grown up around here, I’d like to make it up to you for the last couple of days. You remember how to get to my house, right?”

“I did case the joint for a panty raid,” he recalled.

“And came away with a souvenir as I recall,” she reminded him pointedly. “Be there at seven for dinner. If you behave, you may get dessert. Now try to get some work done.”

“Moi?” He let her see a shocked look on his face. “Oh all right!” He gave her a smile before limping out again.

She kept up an appearance of being busy while he was in eyeshot. Then she chuckled to herself. Let him think what he wants. We know differently. She sighed, thinking of how transparent he really was. Compliant clones indeed! Only in your dreams, Greg.



Chapter 3

As she had promised, Cuddy ordered in a fabulous five course dinner with wine and all of the fixings for them. They ate, laughed and teased each other in her living room in front of a gently burning fire in the fireplace, soft lighting and mood music in the background.

Between their conversation and close proximity, the two doctors revealed their true feelings about each other among other things…..


****

[Next Morning—Cuddy’s Bedroom]

After their nightcap, the couple had slept soundly in each other’s arms….

…That is until her alarm buzzed, breaking the moment of bliss.

“Aw right,” she complained, slamming it into silent submission with a swat of her hand. She looked around at the room and then at her companion snoring away next to her. “What a night.” Then she shook her head. Even when he’s asleep, he can’t stay quiet! She grinned and rubbed his arm. “Hey! Wake up!”

“Stop,” he whined. “I wanna stay here. Write us a note and one of those magic scripts, Doc.”

As much as the thought tempted her, she shook her head. “Sorry. Get up.”

He groused, “Fine. You need to do something about that clock, Cuddy.”

“I’ll take it up with the management,” she retorted sleepily while making her way to the kitchen. “I’ll get the coffee. You shower and dress.”

“Ever the slave driver, aren’t you?” he sassed.

She shook her head. “I want you looking your very best for clinic duty, House.”

He sighed, looking at her with his best impression of puppy dog eyes. “I was hoping for a parole.”

She snorted. “Sorry, House, I’m immune. Besides you’ve had enough time off for bad behavior. Then again, if you do it, I might tell you about an incentive plan.”

He guffawed at that notion. “An incentive plan? Hah! Yeah right. This should be good.” He got out of bed and looked into the kitchen.

“Do your clinic hours and find out for yourself. Now clean up.” She started grinding coffee for them both albeit with a playful smile on her face.

He sighed, knowing what this was going to do to his image. Given that her proposal sounded even remotely appealing, he had to be going soft. “She better make this worthwhile,” he muttered.

“I heard that!” she called. “House, shower! NOW!”

“Yes, Boss!” He saluted sarcastically and limped toward the bathroom, not knowing what to expect and really dreading what he was going to find out about this plan…and himself in the process.



Conclusion [A Week Later]
[Clinic]

House shuffled out of the Room 1, feeling really miserable after dealing with the caseload of hypochondriacs and amateur doctors lying within its white walls. Looking at his watch, he saw it was 5 PM. He limped over to the receptionist’s desk. “Dr. House checking out,” he growled.

The nurse looked expectantly at him but, in accordance with Cuddy’s instructions, said nothing. After all, he was keeping up his end of the bargain. That merited encouragement in its own right. “Thanks, Dr. House. Have a great night.”

He smirked sarcatically. “Sayonora!” He labored out of the glass door and into the lobby where Wilson waited for him. “Yeah? Don’t you have a case or something to worry about? Maybe your patient…I mean roommate?”

Wilson ignored the gibe; his mind was too occupied with his friend’s new found devotion to the glass place beside them. “I’m amazed that you…haven’t missed a shift this week! What’s going on? Are you ill? Wait! You’re sucking up to Cuddy for something! That’s gotta be it!”

House arched his brow at him. “Are you finished yet? It’s such a party in there, I don’t want to miss a single minute!” Then, as if sensing the silver lining to Cuddy’s stratagem, his expression changed, a giant Grinch-like smirk spreading across his face. “And as for Cuddy, that’s for me to know and for you to find out.” With that, he headed for the elevator.

Wilson definitely smelled something. “House, come on!”

“Bye, Wilson!” The diagnostician mockingly waved at his friend as the elevator doors closed.

Wilson put his hands on his hips and shook his head. Something’s definitely up here. He’s toying with us and Cuddy’s in on it with him. Great, now he’s getting to her too! With that, he headed into the clinic for his own shift.


****

[Parking Lot]

After changing coats and grabbing his helmet in his office, House headed out to the parking lot. He wanted nothing more than to get home and check on Steve McQueen not to mention his growling gut.

As he reached his bike, however, he found Cuddy waiting by it. “Funny, people want to know what’s going on?”

“You haven’t told them of course.” She looked at him with amusement. “You’re toying with them, aren’t you?”

“You did say it was an incentive plan, Cuddy. This is one of the incentives.”

She arched her eyebrow at him. “Figures you’d find a creative way to get under everyone’s skin, House. Fine. Let them stew a bit.” She chuckled. “I ran into Cameron earlier.”

Imagining that scene, he looked expectantly at her. “I’ll bet that was priceless.”

“She asked. I didn’t tell. She got that squinty look and stormed away. I think the cameras got it recorded,” Cuddy reported.

“I’ll definitely need to review those tapes,” he agreed, looking forward to getting some fresh jab-material.

“Anyhow, a week in the clinic without skips. Whoever would have thought you could do that? Not bad, House,” she complimented.

“Especially with those whiny kids….” he started.

She rubbed her hand over her face. “You just had to say it, didn’t you? Couldn’t let me enjoy the moment?”

He pointed out, “I said I’d go along with it. I never said that I’d enjoy it.” He let that insight hang in the air between them for a minute before adding, “By the way, you’re out of lollipops.”

She smiled, knowing that he had been handing them out to kids all week. Still, she had to try and score another point in their duel. “No thanks to you.”

“Hey! I’ve been keeping the little whiners happy! Figured you could find some budget line to pay for the suckers!” he protested, letting a smile onto his face now.

She nodded, appreciating where he was going with that request. “Somehow, I don’t think that’s going to be a problem.” She squeezed his left hand and whispered in his ear. “Once again, nice work. Thanks, House. Be by tomorrow about eight.”

“Eight, huh?” he supposed.

“Eight,” she reiterated with a saucy gleam in her eye before getting into her Lexus and driving away.

House shook his head in bewilderment. “Never thought I’d see the day when clinic duty was actually worth doing.” After scratching his head, he got on his bike and put the helmet on. Reving the throttle, he rode off into the sunset, he knew that was true and he knew why….

…In almost a perverse way, Cuddy had made it worthwhile. She definitely had watched him far too often.

…Then again, House wouldn’t have had it any other way.


THE END

 

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